Misspelled words. Poor grammar. Hilarious typos. When we find them, we smile. In contrast to cold, brilliant technology, they remind us we鈥檙e human.
In a national magazine, I recently read a sentence that startled me. At first I couldn鈥檛 understand why. When I read it aloud, it sounded correct. Scanning again, I spotted the culprit. The writer had confused homonyms 鈥� pare and pair.
Every tried to pare your slacks with a narrow shirt?
Proofreaders usually catch things like that, but even sharp eyes miss sometimes. During a stint as a magazine editor, I mistakenly used an embarrassing incorrect word in an editorial. It evaded several levels of proofing before, just before press time, someone caught and removed it.
Today鈥檚 often carelessly written and quickly sent texts and emails carry multiple mistakes. Many of those are thanks to our devices鈥� auto-fill or voice record features. (When the sender types or speaks, the machine assumes to know what is meant and quickly types it, saving a few jabs at the keyboard.)
I鈥檝e learned to check twice before clicking 鈥淪end鈥� on a text. When I first used a Smart Phone, I spoke the words, 鈥淕lory Hallelujah,鈥� while compiling a text to my sister. The phone, not recognizing the recorded phrase, transcribed it as 鈥淎ola Lola!鈥� Off it went without a second look. A cluster of laughing happy faces came flying back.
A moment later I spoke the word 鈥淎men!鈥� in response to her incoming comment. My phone typed quickly, and again I clicked send without checking. Another batch of giggling icons arrived. I glanced back to see what I鈥檇 sent and found the words, 鈥淗ey, Man!鈥�
Bev and I still chuckle over that interchange and have even used it in person. 鈥淎ola Lola!鈥� one of us says, happy over good news. 鈥淗ey, Man!鈥� the other responds. Our very own verbal high-five.
Cookbooks carry hilarious typos. One suggested using 鈥測our own spirts,鈥� to enhance the flavor of a certain dish. (Say what?) Another recommended a sprinkle of salt and 鈥渇reshly ground people.鈥� Thankfully, pepper grinders don鈥檛 come large enough.
Typos escape even the sharp eyes of Bible publishers. 鈥淭hou shalt commit adultery,鈥� read a 1631 King James Bible, later known as the 鈥淲icked Bible.鈥� For their accidental omission of the word 鈥渘ot,鈥� authorities fined the publishers three hundred pounds and revoked their licence to print.
The funniest typo I鈥檝e seen recently came in an email from a friend. After relating some exciting news of progress in his ministry, he closed with, 鈥淎ll glory and horror goes to the Lord, Almighty God鈥︹��
After I finished laughing, I realized something. He鈥檚 right. God gets it all. Every glory and praise for every good thing is rightfully his. But to God鈥檚 great heart also has flown every horror ever committed. His to grieve, his to wear 鈥� brutal crucifixion scars on the resurrected Jesus Christ 鈥� and his to forgive for the asking. But also, ultimately, his to judge.
That typo is worth a long ponder.
