Dumbass criminals getting caught by flashing ID may be more common than you think
It鈥檚 been a while since I鈥檝e done a dumbass criminals column, so I went looking for some new good ones. The first one I came across was from a blog site that told the tale of a robber who, having relieved the clerk of a corner store in Colorado Springs of cash decided he also wanted a bottle of scotch.
The clerk refused because he didn鈥檛 believe the robber was 21. Dumbass showed the clerk his driver鈥檚 licence proving he was 21 and left with both cash and liquor. The clerk called the cops, giving them the name and address of the crook and he was arrested.
Or, so the story goes. I鈥檓 one of those old-school journalists, who doesn鈥檛 like secondary sources, particularly blogs, so I searched. I found an original published item, but it was in the Weekly World News. Given the source, I鈥檓 surprised they didn鈥檛 describe the robber as an alien Elvis.
Other stories in the issue, included a woman smuggling cocaine in a fake butt, would be bank-robbers who tried to negotiate with a bank for a lower payout and a father who cut open his daughter鈥檚 pet guinea pig because he thought it was a robot spy.
I was reminded of the Mike Myers film So I Married an Axe Murderer when his character鈥檚 mom tells him about the axe-murdering wife moving from husband to husband across the country.
Charlie MacKenzie: 鈥淗ey Mom, I find it interesting that you refer to the Weekly World News as, 鈥淭he paper.鈥� The paper contains facts.
May Mackenzie: This paper contains facts. And this paper has the eighth highest circulation in the whole wide world. Right? Plenty of facts. 鈥淧regnant man gives birth.鈥� That鈥檚 a fact.
In any event, I couldn鈥檛 find a more reliable newspaper that covered the ID-showing robber story, or find it on the Colorado Springs Police Department鈥檚 site.
And, none of my favourite debunking sites, such as Snopes.com, had the story.
I cannot definitively say it is not true, however, would-be criminals have done stupider things.
The Internet provided a number of variations on the theme, though, including a UPI (United Press International) story out of Russia.
Apparently, a drunk teenager, brandishing a scythe (interesting weapon of choice) attempted to steal cigarettes and alcohol from a store and got temporarily flustered when the clerk asked him for ID.
He didn鈥檛 show his ID, but the clerk gave in when he repeated his demands and threatened her with the scythe. He was later arrested, anyway.
There was also a case out of Dayton, Ohio, in which a robber walked into a store and purchased a cigar using his driver鈥檚 licence to prove he was of age. He then pulled out a handgun and demanded the money from the register.
The 21-year-old was soon caught, but the report did not say whether the ID was a factor in the investigation.
In fact, it is amazing how common these stories are.
There was a similar case in Missouri in which a guy purchased some adult videos with ID then pulled a gun and robbed the store. The clerk remembered his last name, which led to an arrest.
And another guy accidentally flashed his ID when for some unknown reason he pulled out his wallet while conducting a holdup in Maine.
And those were just from a cursory search. I have to wonder how many I might turn up with more in-depth research.
I have not seen this is Yorkton, yet, but a crime reporter can always hope.
